Life and Love
Where not to go on dates
If you want to make a love connection, skip these date locales.
by : Jen Kirsch- Nov 7th, 2011
When you begin
dating someone new, the first course of action is often deciding on a venue to act as the backdrop of your date. Problem is, men often think they’re being gentlemen by insisting you choose the place. Before you choose the dating destination, there are certain environments you should avoid. Here are a few dating locales that are off-limits:
1. Your classic go-to spot
Sure, a familiar spot is comfortable, and it comes with a certainty that you’ll have a good time. But if your date doesn’t go so well and the guy likes the spot, he can start frequenting there himself. This can make for some very awkward future run-ins (or planned run-ins on his end should you decide to no longer return his calls). Since your favourite café, restaurant and bar is a go-to place of yours, don’t run the risk of spoiling it with an experience you have on a new date. There are
some things better kept to yourself.
2. Somewhere out of your comfort zone
If your date invites you to a house party, a sporting event or a Thai restaurant (and you hate all of the aforementioned), it’s important to speak up before the date so you don’t put yourself in an uncomfortable position. People hold back from admitting lack of interest for fear of coming across as difficult or high maintenance. But it’s crucial to feel comfortable. When you put yourself in an unnatural setting, it’s only normal to act unnatural. This will throw off your date, and your interactions. Avoid going somewhere out of your comfort zone so you can put your best foot forward on the day. After all, a woman who is able to speak up for herself and share something she actually enjoys with someone else is much more attractive than someone who is scared to speak up.
Keep reading for more places to avoid on a date, on the next page…
3. The spot you always went with your ex
This spot likely holds some sentiment for you, even though that relationship has ended. Not only is it not a good idea to open these wounds, but it is also a bit sacrilegious. After all, you’d likely be pretty offended if you found out your ex was bringing a new girl here. Play fair and be respectful of this spot for the memories you shared. Try to avoid it not only with new partners, but all together. That door has closed. Need more convincing? The servers at this spot likely know you from coming there with your ex. Not only does it involve other people in your personal business, but there’s nothing worse than having a clueless server ask about him when you’re out with this new guy, or an informed server ask about how you’re coping.
4. A social gathering
Just because all your friends are going to the same bar the evening you have a date planned, doesn’t mean you should bring your new potential mate there. When you start dating, you need to take time to get to know this person one-on-one. When you step out with a new person at a place that you know your friends frequent, you’re making a pretty big statement. Don’t associate another person with you until you know where you stand. It gets really awkward when people ask you if he’s your boyfriend, and you both have to fumble over awkwardly sharing you’re on a date, and it also leads from questions after the date from outsiders.
The best bet is to let the guy choose where he’s taking you. This gives you an inside glimpse of what types of places he likes. You can tell a lot about a person by where they choose to take you. First impressions are a make-it-or-break-it moment in the dating world. If he insists you choose, tell him that you’d rather he make the decision this time. There is something romantic and old school about the man picking the destination, planning the date, and you just going along for the ride. Let yourself be wooed and in case he pushes for you to decide, keep the above in mind.
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