Relationship advice: Are you ready to move in together?
If you spend all of your
out-of-the-office time with your other half but still live under separate roofs, chances are you’ve flirted with the idea of just moving in together.
But how do you know it’s time to move in together? Here are some questions to ask yourself (plus some sound relationship advice) before you take that next big step.
1. Is it too soon?
Since feelings tend to be so intoxicating at the start of a new relationship, you often can’t imagine ever fighting, or ever wanting to be without one another, but it’s important not to rush things. If it feels organic to move in together right away, why not spend five or so nights a week together, go grocery shopping together, eat your meals and share your living space together and see if that works for both of you. It’s best to test out the waters before making things official.
2. What are your intentions?
Check in with your intentions of moving in together. Is it because it will be more affordable for you? More convenient? Because
you don’t trust him so want to be around 24/7? Heed this relationship advice. Moving in together isn’t a quick fix. Don’t move in with your partner for the wrong reason. Instead you should be moving in together because you’re ready to take the next step in the relationship and because you can’t help but spend most of your time together.
3. How do you go about moving in?
You already live together without the title. You have your own closet full of clothes, have all your toiletries in your bathroom and you eat all your meals together. Though moving in seems like a logical step, it’s important not to slowly move yourself in without asking, but instead have ‘The talk.’ Ask your partner if he wants to make your living arrangement official, and work out how you’ll make it work, what it entails, and a date to make the move that suits both of your wants and needs.
More questions to ask yourself before you make the move, plus relationship advice on the next page …
4. Is there a future?
If you want to eventually
get married to your partner, it’s important to talk about that and about the relationship to ensure you are on the same page. Moving in with someone only to find out down the road that they aren’t interested in taking the next step will not only feel like a waste of time, but will also make the break all that more difficult. Sure, things happen and relationships don’t always work out, but you can save yourself a lot of difficulty by ensuring you’re on the same level with your partner.
5. What about the finances?
Cohabitating may sound like a non-threatening idea, but it’s not all cuddling on the couch and playing house. Before you move in together it is crucial to figure out finances. Who will be paying for what? What is your monthly budget? Are you both comfortable with how you intend on splitting up costs? Money has the potential of making things very uncomfortable. Ensure that you have figured everything out and in writing so you don’t run into issues down the road.