If you're a...Plant Whisperer
Try an orchid. “They can be so fickle because their environment – temperature, light, humidity – needs to be strictly regulated,” says Michael Leach, owner of Dynasty Toronto.
If you're... Perfectly Average
Fiddle-leaf fig trees are like teens – they can be a bit moody, especially because they require a lot of bright, filtered light (read “no direct sunlight”).
If you're... New to the Game
Tropical plants Zanzibar Gem (pictured here) and golden pothos are hardy enough to withstand you ghosting on them for a week or two.
If you...Can't Commit
Rent a plant. Plant stylists tour your apartment to get a feel for your decor/sunlight situ/lifestyle and lend you your ideal match. (Some companies will even return regularly to water it.) This is popular on film sets, so it’s possible your cycad rubbed fronds with an A-lister.
If you're a...No Hoper
Try a leafy wallpaper. Studies say just being around the colour green can be soothing.
Andrea Lauren Wallpaper (from $6.71/ft, at spoonflower.com)
For the latest in fashion, beauty and culture, sign up to receive ELLE's daily newsletter.