In our social media age, knowing how to break up adds even more stress to an already painful situation. Read on for our expert break up advice about the etiquette for modern relationships.
Stephanie Hay, a 24-year-old law student, likes to give guys at least three dates before deciding to call it quits, because she doesn’t believe in first impressions. “If I’m not excited to go on a fourth date with someone, I usually suggest coffee to say that I’m just not interested,” she says. “It can be hard sometimes, but for the most part people realize that they have no claim to you after so little time and we go our own ways without any drama.”
While Hart agrees that in-person communication is always best, she also thinks that a respectful phone call or well-written email will do after only a few dates. “Just don’t Facebook or tweet your feelings,” she says, suggesting that it’s better to avoid passive aggressive behaviour when breaking up. “After three or four dates you may not feel connected enough to do a face-to-face talk, but the other person definitely deserves a direct line of meaningful communication.”
How to break up: After a few months
“Chances are you’ve been naked together so anything less than face-to-face contact is rude and cowardly,” says Hart. Of course the reasons for choosing to be a singleton again definitely plays into how the breakup goes down. Caught your significant other cheating? Meeting for a cordial tête-à-tête may be unnecessary.
However, even in extreme circumstances, getting together once the emotional fall out cools can be helpful. “You need to give each other an opportunity to feel fully expressed,” explains Hart. “But you have to commit to not spending the entire time pointing fingers in order for the conversation to be beneficial.”
Keep reading for Hart's advice about how to break up after a year or more of dating on the next page...