Life and Love
Apr 13, 2009
Life and Love
Apr 13, 2009
1. Cyberspace courtship: Technology and the internet have made it incredibly easy to cheat. says Cunningham. If your guy is particularly secretive with his email, or tends to spend more than 4 or more non-work related hours on the internet a day in chat rooms, websites or webcams, you may want investigate further.
2. Critical mass: If your guy suddenly finds fault with every move you make, he may be straying. According to Cunnigham, if he's always telling you to hit the gym, wear different clothes, or alter yourself in ways to please him, it's a sign he's unhappy in the relationship and therefore prone to cheat. If your beau is overly critical you have to tell him how much that hurts you, she says. If the problems continue to persist after that, consider couples counseling if you want to save the relationship.
3. "I've got plans.": If this is becoming a regular statement every time Friday rolls around, you may want to salute that red flag. The truth of the matter is this: If he's into you, he's going to want to be with you; but, if he's telling you more and more frequently that he wants a night out with "the guys" it could be a sign that something is amiss. The best way to deal with it? Ask him directly, recommends Cunningham. If he gives you a vague answer or dismisses the subject altogether, you know something isn't right.
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Trust me: Is cheating on the rise? 4. Constant connection: Is his iPhone ringing off the hook but he never seems to answer it when you're around? Or, when he does answer will he try to get off as quickly as possible? In this time and age, we're all guilty of being overly connected to our electronic devices, says Cunningham, but if your beau is constantly checking his buzzing Blackberry, you may want to find out who is trying to get in touch with him so badly.
5. Defending his defences: Most of the time, both men and women get defensive when they have something to hide, but if your guy is ranting a serious diatribe on why he was so late coming home one night, your suspicions may not be entirely unfounded. Worse yet, if the conversation turns where he's accusing you of trying to check up on him and that escalates into a fight, it could be a sign he's doing something he doesn't want you to know about.
6. Intimacy issues: This is the most clear indicator that there are problems in paradise. If Sunday morning cuddling has become a thing of the past, you need to be forthright with him to find out why that's no longer happening, suggests Cunningham. Even if he's not cheating on you, losing that intimate connection with your partner is a sure sign that that lovin' feeling is potentially wavering. Men desire affection just like we do, so if you're not giving it to him maybe another woman is. Also of note, says Cunningham, is a change in bedroom behaviour: If he's suddenly suggesting new things that you've never tried before -- or even discussed as a couple -- he may be learning these tricks elsewhere.
(Tasha Cunningham is a leading infidelity expert who has appeared on The Today Show, CNN, the Rachael Ray Show and host of other media outlets advising women about how they can avoid being cheated on. She is creator of DontDateHimGirl.com, a popular online dating advice site with nearly 1-million female registered users. Mrs. Cunningham lives in Miami and is happily married to a great guy of her own!)
We know this is a heady topic, so we'd love to hear your feedback on this story! Are these signs an indicator your man may be cheating or are giving guys a bad rap? Send in your thoughts by posting your feedback online!
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