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Leaving the past behind
Jann gives advice on moving on -- from death, bad exes and leaving home
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DEAR JANN: My father passed away a few years ago and left the selling of his gas station to my 75-year-old mom. Until now, we've been working there seven days a week, and we're tired. My older brother, who has been in jail several times for drunk driving and is mixed up with a dangerous biker gang, doesn't want us to sell. I'm afraid he will hurt us if we sell it. I'm eating all of the time from the stress. I'm single, so I don't have anyone to turn to for help. EMPTY
DEAR EMPTY: Good Lord, girl, sell the damn gas station! Hand your mother a big, fat cheque and take a load off your heart. Your brother is an arsehole. It's hard when people die and leave loose ends, but they can all be tied up again; it just takes a few moments to make changes happen. Get a Realtor, talk to a lawyer about your brother and call the police if he makes any threats toward you or your mother. You have to get away from the hurt and stop hurting yourself. Eating isn't going to make anything better. Sell, sell, sell! Buy a new start for you and your mom.
DEAR JANN: I'm dating a fantastic man, but I'm fearful he's going to turn out like my ex. He has given me no reason to worry. I know that it's unfair to prejudge him. How can I get past this and start fresh? SUSPICIOUS
DEAR SUSPICIOUS: Don't drag your past around with you. We always have to love like we have never been hurt, and no, there are no guarantees that we won't be hurt again. If you choose to love with a cloud on your shoulder, you and your boyfriend are going to miss out on one of the most beautiful things in this world -- freedom. Don't live your life in fear. Don't drag your past around with you. This is new, this is now. You are not what you did, but what you will do.
Got problems? Discuss them with other readers in our forums!
Photo courtesy of Norbert Mayer
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