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Say goodbye to stubborn holiday house guests
Guests from hell? Here are 23 crafty ways to get rid of them.
By ELLECanada.com
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Click here for ELLECanada.com's 30 Days of Holiday Giveaways contest!
It's the 16th day of Christmas -- and they're still here! Luckily, there are plenty of crafty ways to say goodbye to stubborn holiday house guests. Bon voyage, y'all!
1. Play Anne Murray's Snowbird from dusk till dawn -- sing along if that's where the wind blows you.
2. Crank up the heat surreptitiously, then express concern about your guests' perspiration problems.
3. Book home renovators to redo your guest bathroom; offer to pay double if they start on Boxing Day.
4. Place your dog on your guest's lap, then launch into a detailed discussion of Fluffy's various skin ailments.
5. Ask your guests to participate in a family recreation of It's a Wonderful Life -- starring you as "Georgia" Bailey!
6. Take all of the doors off their hinges. In the morning, tell your guests how peaceful they look in their sleep.
7. Walk around the house with a can of Lysol, and spray anything your guests touch.
8. Wake up your guests with a cheerful rendition of Deck the Halls. Once you're certain they're awake, cue up the Anne Murray.
9. Introduce your guests to your new obsessions: ylang-ylang incense and loud Buddhist chanting.
10. Create a chore grid for your guests. Tell them "I'd love to help out, but you know how it is."
11. Scatter ant traps around your guests' bed. If they inquire, tell them you'd rather not talk about it.
12. Hook up video cameras in every room in the house. Tell your guests you don't want to miss a single moment of this special time.
13. Giggle at everything your guests say, even if they are only asking you to pass the salt.
14. Serve a tray of succulent oysters. Later, boast about the amazing bargain they were. Half price!
15. Create an in-house tribal council. Vote out one relative every night.
16. Redecorate your guests' bedroom in a clown motif. Play carnival music on a well-hidden stereo, just for laughs.
17. Stock the fridge with nothing but traditional Scottish delicacies. Mmm, haggis.
18. Place a few bottles of plantar-wart medication inside your guests' medicine cabinet. Walk around barefoot.
19. Display a voodoo-doll version of your family. Every so often, turn one of the dolls to face the wall.
20. Keep a running tab of your guests' expenses. When they ask about it, tell them you're only joking. But keep tallying.
21. Boil every meal.
22. Supply each of your guests with a gratitude journal. Insist that he or she read from it before each meal.
23. Tuck in your guests every night. Tell each one "You're my little Christmas miracle."
Want to be the best holiday guest? Click here to find out how!
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